Some people worry about their spouse, their partner, a family member, or a close friend because of sexual addiction to sexuality. With the fact that many celebrities acknowledge having a sex addiction, most often after being caught cheating on their spouse, the dividing line between an addict and a cheating spouse begins to fade. You may wonder if there are signs that you should watch for. It is important to understand that there is a difference between an unfaithful and untrustworthy person and a person who truly lives with a sexual addiction.
You may not be afraid of your partner, but a family member, friend or spouse of a friend. Perhaps you had a vague feeling that something was wrong and that you did not know enough to tell him about your concerns; Again, are there any signs that you should watch for?
If any of the scenarios above explain the situation you are in, read on. There are signs that you can monitor, revealing behaviors that can serve as a red flag to indicate that a sexual addiction is involved significantly.
1. Sexual Concern
A person with a sexual addiction will have an unusual preoccupation with sexuality and his or her own sexual fantasies. While it is healthy and normal to think about sex and maintain a healthy libido, a person with addiction will be concerned about sex to the exclusion of anything else. Sometimes thoughts and sexual activities will be the most important part of their lives.
If the man or woman of your life is addicted to sex, how will you notice this concern? The person may have magazines and pornographic movies lying around. During conversations, you may notice that they always seem focused on sexual activity or other topics related to sexuality. It can be called or indicate bookstores and adult cinemas, striptease clubs and massage parlors. If this person is your partner, you may notice an extreme sexual appetite – constantly asking to have sex or never wanting to have sex at all.
2. Mood Changes
People who have a sexual addiction can suddenly begin to act with distancing and withdrawal on themselves as they become more concerned about their sexual activity. As the addiction progresses, the addict will face shame, guilt and fear of being discovered, resulting in mental and physical withdrawal from those around him. Their work, their social circles, their families, and their normal activities will begin to suffer from a lack of attention.
The cycle of addiction usually starts with the abandonment of addicts, preoccupied with their fantasies. This is followed by the excitement of sexual ritual or hunting, the aggravation of fantasy, and finally shame and guilt after the fact. For family and friends, this cycle of sexual addiction will look like depression and mood swings. Sexual addicts will often be tired, sick and grumpy because of lack of sleep and the effects of time spent on their sexual behavior.
3. Reactionary Answers
People struggling with sex addiction go to great lengths to avoid being discovered and develop eradication defenses. If you ask a story about a story that has been told to you or is too close to the truth, an addict could become very irritated and create a complex story, a lie or simply a denial. A simple question or possibly an insignificant statement or event could result in a disproportionate anger reaction from an addict.
People who are sexually addicted are not subject to constructive criticism and may feel challenged or threatened by increased supervision.
4. Sexual Humor
People with a sexual addiction may use a form of sexual humor most of the time, teasing or telling sexual jokes. People with this addiction tend to sexualise most situations and find humor. If someone in your life is a sex addict, you may notice that he or she often reports statements with a double meaning, a phrase that could have two meanings, one of which is sexual.
Sexual jokes can also be used to find new sexual partners. People with a sexual addiction can watch a person's reaction when they hear their sexual joke and, if the reaction is favorable, they can increase the level of sexual engagement.
5. Inappropriate Sexual Behavior
People who are addicted to sex are not hard to spot if you know what to look for. They always tell sexual jokes or touch people in a way that does not seem right to them. They are too affectionate and are always looking for attractive people.
Sexual addiction is a progressive behavior that worsens as the disease continues unaided. Over time, people with this addiction can be very direct and talk to you about sex or invite you home with them. As the disease progresses, the inappropriate behavior will worsen, as will the consequences of that behavior.
If your spouse is an addict, he will probably be more and more frustrated with sexual activity in your marriage / relationship. This could lead to avoiding sex in an attempt to alter frustration or because sexual needs are met outside of marriage. A person with a sexual addiction may be increasingly solicited for sexuality and for certain types of activities or may not be interested in sex at all.
6. Difficulty in life
As sex addiction progresses, addicts spend more and more time thinking and trying to obtain sex. This leaves less time available for all other areas of life including work, family, friends, sleep and other obligations. If you start noticing that these activities are ignored, you can be sure that the energy normally spent in these areas is used elsewhere.
Over time, jobs and incomes may be lost. Relationships and friendships that were once important can be compromised. If illegal behavior is involved in the sexual dependence of the individual, there may be arrests and time spent in jail.
7. Direct Evidence
On the occasion, as the disease progresses, you will likely be confronted with some sort of direct evidence of the problem . This can take the form of credit card bills with company names you do not recognize, phone bills with 900 numbers, pornographic material, evidence of infidelity, closed door or locked door and so on.
If, after reading the above, you believe that there is a person in your life who is struggling with sexual addiction, there are things that can be done to help. Confronting the individual, offering help and taking steps to avoid negative behaviors are all ways to manage sexual addiction in a friend or relative.